this week, and my lack of ability to even
Jan. 17th, 2015 08:46 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jazzfishThis week I have run headlong into a bunch of things I can't do.
Cut for whining.
Techniques I can't seem to grasp.
Viola proceeds poorly. About half of that is "i am bad at these things but it's the kind of bad that i think practice will take care of." Which, whatever. I can do practice when it seems to be doing some good. It's the things that don't seem to be improving, that I can't do even partly right, that frustrate me.
And it's basic stuff too. Different bow strokes, mostly, which I somehow never learned on cello. I cannot work out how to play quickly and evenly with an accent at the start (martelé), or how to move my elbow to play smoothly (détaché), or even how to just play a normal full down-bow without a weird wobbling sound.
Bleh. I begin to wonder if I ought to give up. Will give it six months at least.
On Monday I opened Scrivener intending to finally get around to revising a story that I got good feedback on nearly a year ago. Got as far as rereading the first (highly positive!) paragraph of critique and my brain hopped the noperocket out of there.
I have no idea what the hell that was about.
(Actually I do. If I never finish the %&$ story it exists forever in my head in perfect form. If I do get around to finishing it then it goes out into the world, warts and all, and gets judged and found severely wanting despite being the best I could do.)
Got as far as actually attacking it yesterday, got some minor tweaks in, and... it's like wading through molasses. I have no faith that the changes I'm making will make it any better, or won't break other things elsewhere, and I have no idea how to do the bigger things I want to make it do. Ugh.
Next week, maybe.
Cut for whining.
Techniques I can't seem to grasp.
Viola proceeds poorly. About half of that is "i am bad at these things but it's the kind of bad that i think practice will take care of." Which, whatever. I can do practice when it seems to be doing some good. It's the things that don't seem to be improving, that I can't do even partly right, that frustrate me.
And it's basic stuff too. Different bow strokes, mostly, which I somehow never learned on cello. I cannot work out how to play quickly and evenly with an accent at the start (martelé), or how to move my elbow to play smoothly (détaché), or even how to just play a normal full down-bow without a weird wobbling sound.
Bleh. I begin to wonder if I ought to give up. Will give it six months at least.
On Monday I opened Scrivener intending to finally get around to revising a story that I got good feedback on nearly a year ago. Got as far as rereading the first (highly positive!) paragraph of critique and my brain hopped the noperocket out of there.
I have no idea what the hell that was about.
(Actually I do. If I never finish the %&$ story it exists forever in my head in perfect form. If I do get around to finishing it then it goes out into the world, warts and all, and gets judged and found severely wanting despite being the best I could do.)
Got as far as actually attacking it yesterday, got some minor tweaks in, and... it's like wading through molasses. I have no faith that the changes I'm making will make it any better, or won't break other things elsewhere, and I have no idea how to do the bigger things I want to make it do. Ugh.
Next week, maybe.
no subject
Date: 2015-01-21 04:50 pm (UTC)And, I might take you up on that, once I finish this round of edits. Fresh eyes are always good.