"the compliant child"
Jul. 21st, 2019 08:36 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jazzfishLast week Martha Wells pointed me at Nancy Werlin's graphic memoir-in-progress (lengthy; content warning for excessive narcissism, emotional abuse, and abandonment of an animal) and I spent my not-staring-at-work time for the day binging it. It's ... first-draft-y, and incomplete, and very raw in places. Also compelling reading, at least for me.
(If you're so inclined, once you're caught up you can follow along at![[syndicated profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/feed.png)
nancywerlin_feed.)
Nearish the beginning Nancy is in therapy, talking about her parents and her autistic sister whose care took up much of their attention. In the midst of that there's this strip, which made me sit straight up and say Oh.
But seeing it just ... put out there, like that ... I think that's the first time since reading the Military Brats book that I've felt like I'm not completely alone inside my head. That this really is stuff that other people have dealt with. That maybe there's a way through it.
(If you're so inclined, once you're caught up you can follow along at
nancywerlin_feed.)Nearish the beginning Nancy is in therapy, talking about her parents and her autistic sister whose care took up much of their attention. In the midst of that there's this strip, which made me sit straight up and say Oh.
NANCY: But I understood even as a child.This wasn't a huge revelation for me. It's something I came to a few years ago, though of course I'd phrase it a bit differently. Something more like "whenever i did something wrong it always got substantial negative attention / punishment, so maybe if i did everything right that would get me the positive attention i needed."
ANGELIKA THE THERAPIST: Really? You never made a bid for attention?
NANCY'S MOM: No! Nancy was a remarkably mature child! We never had to worry about her! Such a relief!
THERAPIST: Any chance the remarkable maturity WAS your bid for attention?
But seeing it just ... put out there, like that ... I think that's the first time since reading the Military Brats book that I've felt like I'm not completely alone inside my head. That this really is stuff that other people have dealt with. That maybe there's a way through it.
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Date: 2019-07-22 03:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-07-22 04:03 pm (UTC)To answer the question you actually asked, I'm not sure? I think it started in 2013.
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Date: 2019-07-22 05:15 pm (UTC)That sounds like a very long time commitment ;(
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Date: 2019-07-22 08:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-07-22 11:31 pm (UTC)tryingto work on not losing that much time :)